Saturday, August 31, 2013

Back to Work part 3

I officially went back to my full time job on Thursday.  I was only there for a couple of hours due to my wife's surgery but that will be another post.  I was at work all day Friday.  While I was there for the past day and a half, I realized my 3 week hiatus due to my surgery may not have been that bad at all.  I had dinner on Thursday evening with a current and a former co-worker.  We spent an hour talking about work.  My return re-emphasized my thought that some people refuse to listen.  Prior to going on leave I made a discovery about a potential problem.  I pointed this potential problem out to people I thought would be pro-active and get ahead of the issue.  Surprise!  No one did anything and now the situation is fubar.  I don't know how much longer I will be able to do this.  

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Back to Work part 2

Tomorrow will be my first day back at my full time job.  Initially I was looking forward to returning to work and catching up with my peers.  There have been a lot of changes in the weeks I have been gone.  People from the job have kept me informed on some of the changes but not all.  Based on what they have told me, I am as estatic about returning as I once was.  I hope it is all their biased opinions and things have not taken a turn for the worse as they repeatedly told me.  I guess I will find out tomorrow when I go back to work.

No Deja Vu

During the last few days, the nephew has called on me for a few favors.  He asked to borrow a couple of dollars for gas.  He asked for information on how to find a business.  He asked to borrow some tools to complete some repairs.  It didn't really dawn on me until the phone call today what was happening.  He called to ask if I was at work.  When I told him no he asked could he stop by and get something to eat later from my part time job.  I reminded him that I don't work that job on Wednesdays.  That's when everything clicked.  He was falling back into the same routine as when he was living here.  Oh well.  Time to put a stop to that immediately.  No time for deja vu.  Been through that once.  Can't afford to deal with it again.

The Power of Silence

Sometimes in life it's not about what you say.  It's about what you don't say.  People often say that "actions speak louder than words."  Sometimes it's about what you do and don't do which has the biggest impact on a person.  Choose your words carefully as well as the actions you take.

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

WTF - Reading is Fundamental

Ever since watching the movie "Class Act," one of my favorite quotes has been "Reading is fundamental."  With that said, I was reminded on this on yesterday.  The nephew called me for information on locating a business.  I had never heard of the place so I tried to search for it on the internet.  I found an address and a phone number.  I gave it to him and he told me the number was not a working number.  I informed him that was the only information I could find.  I asked him where did he get the name of the business.  It was on a FedEx envelope he received weeks ago.  I looked at the envelope and quickly discovered the problem.  The place of business he was looking for was located in another city.  Plus the contact number was right there on the envelope.  WTF?  Did you not read the return address for the package before you contacted me?  Apparently not.  As I stated in the beginning, reading is fundamental.

Back to Work

Yesterday was my first day back at work.  Due to a misunderstanding about my return, I did not go in to my full time job.  I did however spend 5 hours at my part time job.  Needless to say, the crew was as happy to see me as I was to see them.  It really felt good to know I was missed.  It felt even better to be back in the swing of things.   Hopefully my life is on the track to get back to normal, whatever that is.

Thursday, August 22, 2013

Follow Up with the Surgeon

I had my follow up visit with the surgeon and things went pretty much as I anticipated.  I spent most of my visit in the waiting room.  The nurse called me back to check my weight and blood pressure.  She placed me in a room to wait for the doctor.  He came in, took a quick look at the healing of the incision and asked how I was feeling.  I responded that I was feeling fine and was able to function as normal.  He and I agreed I could safely return to work next week.  So there you have it.  Three weeks out of work for an internal hernia.  Who would have figured something like that would happen to a guy like me?

Cause for Panic

I'm usually a very calm and collected person.  I don't let everyday stuff get under my skin.  Where other people get upset/frustrated/irritated, I just charge it to the game and move on.  That is usually the case.  This morning however, was a whole different category.  Considering I have not worked since my surgery, I was curious if my paycheck would be for a full 2 weeks of work.  I thought that since I had plenty of vacation time left everything would be ok.  No such luck.  I was only paid for a couple of days.  With insurance deductions and taxes, my check is scheduled to be less than $20.  Now that is a reason to panic - especially when major bills like car note and mortgage have not been paid.  Add to that the fact that I have other transactions I set for payday under the assumption I was receiving close to a full check and you can see the hole I dug myself.  So I panicked for a minute.  Just a minute.  Anything longer than that is pointless.  I calmed down and started thinking of how to remedy the situation.  Luckily the wife was able to call in a favor to get some money and so was I.  We should be ok for now.  But in my normally calm world, there was a true reason to panic this morning.

Opportunity for Payback

Karma has a way of rewarding those who wait for opportunity.  That being said, I have a great chance to repay my wife for her actions while I was in the hospital a couple of weeks ago.  She is scheduled for surgery on her shoulder next Thursday.  At this point in time, I am not aware of any of her family coming down to help.  Therefore, when she has the surgery, I'm going to do her the same way she did me.  No phone communication.  I'm going to politely take her phone from her and return it when I feel like it.  So when her family and friends call or text for an update, they will be in the dark.  Now is that spiteful? Yes.  Mean-spirited?  Of course.  Do I give a damn? No.  Payback can be so rewarding.

Back to the Doctor

I'm about 12 hours away from my follow up appointment with the surgeon.  All kinds of thoughts are running through my mind.  On the one hand, I feel good overall and think I can return to work.  On the other hand, I don't know if I really want to go back based on all the bullshit I have been hearing about the place since I had my surgery.  I also noted that when I tried to get up a little while ago, my pain level seemed higher than it had been over the last few days.  I'm not too sure what to make of that.  Guess we will have to wait on the good doctor and see what he says.

Monday, August 19, 2013

A Change for a Black Sheep

The title of this post holds a double meaning.  For the first time in over 10 years I attended church service.  Now don't get me wrong, church is fine for those who had the time and desire to attend on a regular basis.  Unfortunately the last few years have not been kind enough to grant me such things.  Considering I am still unable to work due to my recent surgery, I thought today would be a good day to finally check out the Mormon church service.  This is where the Black Sheep part of the title comes in.  I dressed myself in a black dress shirt, tie and khakis to attend the service.  Little did I know that it was customary for the men of the church to wear white dress shirts.  So I stuck out like a black sheep.  No big deal.  The members of the church were understanding and accepting.  Two members of the church gave testimonials today.  They both talked about change - the other part of the title.  As they discussed changes they made in their lives and how change was important, I thought about recent changes for me.  I thought about where I currently am in life and where I want to be.  I'm really thinking I need to make some changes in my life to be happy.  The changes will not be easy but they will be necessary.  I guess it really may be time for this black sheep to shed his coat and try on something new.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Rubbing Salt In a Wound

Anyone who has ever watched the "Lethal Weapon" series should immediately get the title reference.  This is how I felt yesterday.  I had a training session scheduled at work.  The session was scheduled months ago.  Since it was only supposed to last 3 hours I figured I could endure the pain and come home.  I mentioned to my wife on Tuesday night that I planned on going.  Keep that part in mind as you continue to read.  So yesterday I got up and got dressed.  I told my wife to wish me luck and took the 10 minute drive.  Once I arrived at the building, I went to speak to my boss to let her know my recovery was going well.  I did not receive a warm reception.   It seems my wife had phoned my boss and told her my intentions.  My boss read me the riot act and told me to leave.  WTF?  I don't know at that point if I was more upset with my boss for not being happy to see I was doing ok or at my wife for taking the bitch way out of handling the situation.   So I'm basically stuck at the house for a month.  Talk about rubbing salt in a wound.  How am I supposed to heal when no one wants to let me try and regain my strength?

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Karma or Coincidence

I've been thinking about what happened to me last week and I have started to question if the situation was karma or coincidence.  Last week along with my regular weekly check I earned a small bonus from the company for not using all of my sick days during the year.  I had planned for the extra money to cover my girls school needs as well as some funds for me to do something nice for myself.  My surgery happened at just the right time to ruin those plans because now the extra money I would have had must be used to cover what I won't be making because I am off work for a month.  So is it just a coincidence that I got sick right when I had some extra dollars coming my way?  Or did karma see fit to prevent me from spending money on something I may regret later?  Who knows?

Cell Phone Hostage

As I discussed in the last couple of posts, I had surgery last Wednesday.  Good news is that it happened on my day off.  Bad news is that that my wife decided to hold my cell phone hostage until Friday.  I was supposed to be at work Thursday morning.  Obviously that was not going to happen.  I was unable to alert me boss to my absence because, guess what?  I didn't have my damn cell phone.  My wife asked for the number to my manager so she could talk to her.  Guess what?  I don't have the number memorized!  I need my cell phone to get the number for you.  After two days of foolishness and not giving me my phone, she brings it to the hospital without the charger.  Are you fucking serious?  Really?  I know she thought she was doing what was in my best interest but in actuality she was only succeeding in pissing me off.  I still can't figure out why she wanted to keep my cell phone hostage for 2 days.

Strange Bedfellows

During my stay at the hospital, I had a lot of random, weird thoughts and dreams.  Most were interrupted by someone needing to check my vitals or give me some medication.  Part of one of the dreams really stuck out to me and I wanted to make sure I talked about it on the blog.  In this dream, I was on the beach somewhere.  Apparently there was some sort of carnival or festival going on because there were lots of people, food distributors and games.  As I was walking along, I came across a group of females dressed in similar but not identical outfits.  They were getting ready for some type of contest.  I recognized one of the ladies as one of my agents from work.  She is slightly older than my average agent but she does her job just the same.  As I approached her in the dream, she pulled her top off revealing her bare breasts.  Needless to say I was shocked.  She looked at me and said, "These young girls can't compete with these breasts! Go ahead, touch them!"  I told her to put her shirt back on cause she was in public.  I also told her, jokingly, that if she played her cards right, I would play with them later.  The dream faded to black and the next scene was me and the agent in bed together.  We were still fully clothed but things were getting heated.  It was at this point when I woke from the dream.  I'm not too sure what led to the dream.  I have never looked at or thought about this agent in a physical way.  Maybe it was the medicine they were giving me at the hospital.  Who knows?  I just know that dream had some strange bedfellows.

No Pain No Gain

I shocked some of the hospital staff during my 5 day visit with them last week.  Immediately after my surgery, one of the nurses asked if I needed any pain medication.  I told her no and that my current pain level was tolerable.  She said ok and reminded me that I had some medication ordered if I needed it.  I never needed it.  Every nurse that came in the room asked the same question and got the same response.  One of the nurses stated to me she had seen guys twice my size have less invasive surgeries than my procedure and they would demand pain meds.  Sorry.  I'm not like most guys.  I figured the fastest road to recovery was to work through the pain rather than try to mask it with drugs.  No pain, no gain.

Liquid Diet

After my surgery, I could not have any food until my stomach had a few days to heal.  I was on IV fluids until they upgraded me to solid foods.  Anybody that knows me, knows the last thing I need is a liquid diet.  I weigh about 120 pounds at my heaviest.  So imagine my surprise when the doctor had me on IV fluids and chicken broth for 4 for the 5 days I spent in the hospital last week.  I joked with some of my co-workers and told them I was going to disappear due to lack of nutrients. On the other side of the coin, I was never so happy to get a piece of bland, unseasoned, baked hospital chicken as I was on Sunday.  It was the first piece of real food I had been given since I was admitted.  And it was delicious.

Stomach Ache = Surgery

Last Wednesday was the first day of school for my 2 oldest kids.  I made sure I was awake early cause the 8yr old had to catch the bus at 630am.  I noticed a pain in my abdomen at the time but didn't think too much of it.  I figured it was due to the bag of jellybeans I ate before laying down for the night.  After my other child was off to school, I tried to go about my Wednesday as I typically would but the pain would not go away.  I kept thinking it was gas or constipation.  I went to the bathroom and that brought no relief.  By Wednesday afternoon, I found myself laying on the couch in pain.  I ended up going to the ER cause none of the local clinics were immediately available.  Once at the ER, the doctor came into the exam room, said some long-winded doctor-like phrase that didn't mean shit to me and told me that he wanted to run a CT scan on me.  While waiting on the CT scan, I started vomiting.  Nothing like puking your guts out to make medical professionals put some pep in their step.  After the scan, the doctor told me I needed surgery immediately.  Apparently I had developed a hole in my bowel and my intestine decided to go through the hole.  The intestine was actually trapped in the hole and was being cut off to the point it was turning colors.  The doctor told my wife in 25 years on medicine, he had never seen anything like it.  Guess I was lucky he knew what to do to fix my stomach ache.  

The Past 7 Days

It's been one week since my last post.  Now at one point in time, this would be the normal time frame of me procrastinating before trying to cram a week's worth of my life into a few quick posts.  This time however, the delay was caused by something a little more than a lack of enthusiasm.  I've been in the hospital and am now stuck at home recovering.  I'll detail the what and why in the next next posts as well as talk about things that cross your mind when you are facing pain and the unknown.  It's been an interesting 7 days.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

It's Not Always About You

One of my friends gave me a shirt that says "I Don't Know What I Would Do Without You but I Bet It's Awesome."  I was wearing the shirt one day last week and the wife happened to look at it.  Her response was "What's that supposed to mean?  You got problem with me?"  I replied back to her, "Who said the shirt was even talking about you?  You ASSUMED it was about you and just made an ass of yourself in the process."  I need her to understand my world does not revolve around her.

It's Hard in the Real World part 2

The nephew contacted me again this weekend asking for money.  Being a convicted felon, he has to see a parole officer and pay a fee once a month.  Well it is time to see the parole officer and he does not have the funds to cover the fee.  Hell, he does not even have the gas money to drive to the police station.  I don't know what is going to happen to him but I cannot help him.  If not paying this parole fee doesn't land him in jail, the unpaid ticket he has will.  That letter arrived last week stating if he did not appear in court next month, a warrant would be issued for his arrest.  It's hard in the real world.

Friday, August 2, 2013

It's Hard in the Real World

The nephew has quickly discovered that the real world is a lot harder than it appears to be when you are not ready to handle it on your own.  He has been out of the house 3 weeks.  During that time, he has contacted my on occasion for gas money.  He has also received letters in the mail about his bank account being overdrawn, car note not paid, a traffic ticket and various medical bills.  He's learning real fast that it hard in the real world.  I tried to teach him what he needed to survive but he neglected my lessons. Oh well.

WTF - Songs about Cheating

I was home on Wednesday doing my usual cleaning.  I was working on folding clothes in my room when the wife decided to come in and talk to me.  I usually listen to music while working at home to help pass the time.  I don't remember what song was playing.  The wife made the comment "Why is it that most of the songs you listen to are about cheating?"  I just looked at her.  WTF?  What in the blue hell are you talking about?  Most of what I listen to is old R&B.  Baby-making music as some like to call it.  Now every now and then I will listen to something about infidelity but not all the time.  More importantly, it's just music.  It's not how I live my life.  I need her to stop being so paranoid.

WTF Moment - Saddlebags

I had to work the day shift at my fast food job on Tuesday.  While I was there,  a woman walked in with her 2 kids.  She did not appear to be very old - maybe late 30s or early 40s.  She walked up to the counter to place her order and I noticed her outfit.  She was wearing sandals, capris and a spaghetti strap top.  The top was low cut.  Now let me remind you that I am a man and dammit I'm going to take full advantage of any opportunity to observe the beauty of a female.  I was truly disappointed.  This ladies's breasts looked like 2 saddlebags - flat and lifeless.  WTF?  Why do you come out the house trying to show off your nonexistent titties?  Next time wear a tshirt and a padded bra.  Yes, I know I am wrong for that statement but guess what?  This is my blog.  These are my thoughts and opinions.  If you don't like, feel free to stop reading.